Friday, October 24, 2008 11:26 PM


Recalling the amount of time I have spent in TPJC, I can’t stop thinking about how much I have changed over this period of time. Have I grown for the better, or not? I am sure that it would not be for me to judge. But I am very certain about one thing. My first year in TPJC is definitely not an easy year. Things have been happening around me, regardless good or bad. But everybody still has to move on. I have seen how much people have changed over this period of time; people grow and become more mature in their thinking. I would say that it is great.

Time changes and people change too. Sometimes, I feel that I no longer understand the people around me. Or should I say that people no longer understand me? I feel terrible when these familiar faces slowly become strangers to me. This feeling is really terrible! How I wish to know what is going on in their lives that turned them this way. The laughter and smile we used to have had disappeared. Everything is gone, nothing left.

I could still barely remember that people used to ask me, “Why are you so quiet?” I would usually give them a smile and try to avoid answering the question. But in fact, what could I say when there is nothing to be said? What could I say when no one bothers to listen? What could I say if people treat me as if I am invisible? Perhaps silence is the best alternative.
I have been trying to step out of my comfort zone, overcoming the fears I used to have. True enough, I managed to overcome some of them. I would say that more could be done.

Humans are animals that cannot be satisfied. No matter how much as have, they would still be asking for more. Me myself is also an ordinary human being, I am also a person with greed. I have high expectation for others, but I do not have it for myself. How ironic is that? I really do not want to become like the rest of the people in the world, becoming the slave for money. I believe that it is definitely not the purpose of life! So, what do I want in life? Time for me to think about that.

-siqi
personal reflection

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