Monday, August 11, 2008 
11:43 AM ♥
There are many things happened within my life are out of my control. I can only do my own part, and the rest is all up to God to decide. Things do not happened the way I wanted, it always turn out unexpected. Of course, I am upset or frustrated about it. But, I know that I cannot throw my tantrum because of it. I need to grow in my tolerance. But before this is accomplished, I am already reaching to my limits. I do not think I can go on any further. I just do not understand. I have attempted to change what I am used to be, I am changing. But why do things still do not improved. I am totally discouraged about it. Why is this challenge so difficult to accomplished? I am feeling so miserable now. All I can do is to tolerate and tolerate what more can I do? It does not feel good to bottle up my feelings, but what I can do? I cannot show my displeased, I can only try to put up a smile on my smile. This is painful. I have already belittled myself, what more do I need to do? I do not want to fall back into the pit that I have climbed out of it hard. So, what can I do? I am feeling so lost.
-siqi
God, help me!
♡ 
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Monday, August 11, 2008 11:43 AM ♥
There are many things happened within my life are out of my control. I can only do my own part, and the rest is all up to God to decide. Things do not happened the way I wanted, it always turn out unexpected. Of course, I am upset or frustrated about it. But, I know that I cannot throw my tantrum because of it. I need to grow in my tolerance. But before this is accomplished, I am already reaching to my limits. I do not think I can go on any further. I just do not understand. I have attempted to change what I am used to be, I am changing. But why do things still do not improved. I am totally discouraged about it. Why is this challenge so difficult to accomplished? I am feeling so miserable now. All I can do is to tolerate and tolerate what more can I do? It does not feel good to bottle up my feelings, but what I can do? I cannot show my displeased, I can only try to put up a smile on my smile. This is painful. I have already belittled myself, what more do I need to do? I do not want to fall back into the pit that I have climbed out of it hard. So, what can I do? I am feeling so lost.
-siqi
God, help me!
♡
February 2006